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I know, grumpy updates suck, but…

Maybe someone out there can find humor in my grumpiness:

I’m reporting live from work after a crisis situation the likes of which I haven’t had to deal with recently. I’m staying late again and made a cup of crappy convenience store soup for dinner (in a mug). I got one sip of it before the handle broke off and I got soup all over my slacks. I am now hungry, whiny, and smell strongly of minestrone. I’m sure everyone on the Yamanote line will love me tonight. It’ll probably just be a further excuse for gaijin to have a bad rep. My apologies to the foreign community in Japan. You can blame me if you don’t get a seat on the train tomorrow. Maybe at some point I’ll look back and think this is funny, but for right now…ugh.

Also, to the person who found my blog while searching for “appropriate response to irrasshaimase”, the correct response is nothing. If you responded every time someone said it to you while you were out shopping, your head would explode. This is a fact. I’ve seen it happen to unwitting tourists just looking to have a fun afternoon in Harajuku. They’re gazing happily at the myriad of trendy merchandise, nodding to every person that calls out to them, and BAM! They turn into a melting, weeping, shivering puddle of humanity with only the strength left to pray that the tiny Japanese girl with the shrill voice will STOP yelling about how much the fantastic new tights in her shop cost. Graphic, I know. But I feel it’s my duty to educate the youth.

Workers are programmed to say it every 8.6 seconds if they are not helping another customer. Don’t be fooled by lazy people who create their own variations on the word such as “rashaimaaaaseee”, “maseeee” or even just “eeeeeee”! They’re all out to get you. Save yourself! Don’t respond! Play deaf! Until you need something.

That’s all. I’m going to try and will a freshness burger to appear on my desk.

One Comment

  1. Steve Steve October 7, 2009

    hope things turn a corner for you soon!

    mmmm… Freshness Burger.

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